Michael Graubart’s New Book ‘Three Simple Rules’ Out Now!

Three Simple RulesRecovery is hard, but it doesn’t have to be complicated. If sobriety were easy, everybody who wanted to be sober would be. And especially for those who are just starting out in Alcoholics Anonymous, Narcotics Anonymous, or another Twelve Step program, the prospect of trying to change drinking, using, or other harmful behaviors can seem overwhelming. The good news is there are just three key things we need to focus on.

Trust God. Clean house. Help others.

Three Simple Rules offers a new take on this valuable slogan and explains how these rules can help anyone find fulfilling recovery. Author Michael Graubart also knows that those six short words are packed with meaning and may not sound so straightforward. Luckily, you don’t have to figure it out on your own. Michael uses wit and wisdom gained in more than twenty years of Twelve Step recovery to explain what worked for him so you can figure out what works you. In Michael’s experience, if you follow the Steps, and focus on the three simple rules, you’ll be changed by the process.

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How Can I Tell If I Still Love My Wife?

Dear Sober Dad,

How can I tell if I still love my wife?

—XXX S, Moline, Illinois

Dear Sober Dad,

My wife and I met and got married when I was still drinking. I don’t feel we have that much in common now that I’m sober. She was never much of a drinker, so it’s not about that. We have two kids. Now what?

—Barry J, Tempe, Arizona

Dear XXX and Barry,

I’m answering your questions jointly because they are so deeply related.

I’d like to take you back to my 11th grade English class, where Mr. Jameson had us read the novel, The Bridge of San Luis Rey. The lesson of the book, he taught us, was that in a relationship, it doesn’t always happen that two people love each other the same amount at any one time. Continue reading “How Can I Tell If I Still Love My Wife?”

What’s the Best Way to Express to My Family How I Feel When They Hurt My Feelings?

Dear Sober Dad,

What’s the best way to express to my wife or kids how I feel when they hurt my feelings? I don’t want to be a jerk about it, but at the same time, they need to know.

–Steve T., Fort Myers, Florida


I appreciate the fact that you are a true New Age Sensitive guy – I think there’s a song to that effect.

But while your heart is in the right place, I have to question your basic premise.

There’s a rule of marriage I learned early on, and it goes like this: Continue reading “What’s the Best Way to Express to My Family How I Feel When They Hurt My Feelings?”